Wheel Of Torture
by feistyfire
Summary: Well, it's been a while but here we are with chapter 6!  Sorry to you all you AllenxLenalee fans but some hearts are broken in this chapter, but there is nothing that poker can fix! And remember, banana's do weird stuff to your head.
1. Episode 1

***This strory is written by Feistyfire and Kuroi Ookami13 and sadly, neither of us own DGM. But! We do own these torture methods!***

Feisty and Kuroi: "Welcome to the new game show, 'Wheel of Torture!' And we are your hostesses! Kuroi and Feisty!"

Kuroi: "Meet our contestants! We have Yuu Kanda, Lenalee Lee, Lavi, Komui, Rever, Road, Tyki, and Moyashi!"

Feisty: "Moyashi?"

Moyashi: "THE NAME'S ALLEN!"

Kuroi: "But our list says 'Moyashi.' I wonder who changed it?" *looks at Lavi who is laughing his ass off.*

Kanda: "Che. Why am I even here?"

Lavi: "Cuz Lenalee asked you and you couldn't say no…."

Kanda: "Shut up baka usagi before I cut your head off!"

Kuroi: "Hand it over kanda"

Kanda: *grumbles and unwillingly hands over mugen*

Feisty: "Okay! Now that problem is solved! Here are the rules, You spin this outrageously giant wheel behind me and have to complete the matter of torture on it!

Kuroi: "And if you spin and land on a 'Pass' you will get a free pass to not go through the torture! And since Lavi so energetically volunteered! He can go first…."

Lavi: " OOOOKAAAY!" *spins wheel*

Feisty: Your torture is…eating wasabii!"

Lavi: "…..eww…"

*ONE HUGE SERVING OF WASABII LATER*

Kuroi: So how's it taste Lavi? Good?

Lavi: ugh.. *Vomits*

Kuroi: Now somebody gets to clean up the vomit!

Feisty: um.. Kuroi, they only get tortured if the spin the-

Kuroi: fine.. I'll clean it up. *frowns*

Feisty: No no, you don't have to, our assistant can clean it up!

Earl: Why am I your assistant?

Kuroi: So we don't have to clean up anything disgusting or life threatening! Komui, your next.

Hostesses: SPIN THAT WHEEL!

Komui: Here goes…..something…

Feisty: This torture is beneficial for everyone! You have to watch komlin destroy itself!

Everyone but Komui and Lavi(half dead in the corner): WOOOHOOO!

Komui: NOOOOO NOT MY BABY!

Kuroi: Strap him down! *grins*

Feisty: YAY! Who wants popcorn?

*While Komlin self destructs and Komui is crying hysterically, everyone else is watching the scene unfold before them cheering*

Allen: Whoa! Did his spirit just leave his body?

Kanda: I hope so….

Lenalee: BROTHER! COME BACK TO YOUR BODY! YOU HAVE PAPERWORK TO DO!

Kuroi: Earl, picked up the remains!

Earl: Meanie...

Feisty: So who's next?

Kuroi: Hm... Tyki's playing this right?

Feisty: Yeah.

Tyki: *Spins wheel*

Feisty: Tyki, no more smoking.

Tyki: Fine... *pouts*

Kuroi: They're bad for your heath any way.. cant have you dying early! *hugs Tyki*

Fiesty: ... ANYWHO! Who should go next?

Kanda: Moyashi is fallining out of his seat to go next.

Allen: IT'S ALLEN! And I don't wanna go ne-

Hostesses: MOYASHI IT IS! SPIN THAT HUNK OF JUNK!

Allen: *heavy sigh, spins wheel* Surgery?

Feisty: You have to get surgery from Komlin!

Kuroi: Surgery surgery when in doubt surgery!

Allen: But Komlin is destroyed. *big smiles!*

Feisty: We have back-ups for-

Kuroi: -purposes that you don't need to know.

Hostesses: *grins* SURGERY TIME!

Allen: AAHHHH! HELP MEEEEE!

*After surgery*

Feisty: Hey Assistant! Clean this mess up!

Kuroi: NEXT!~

Allen: I think bakanda wants to go next.

Kanda: What? No!

Hostesses: OH YES! SPIN THAT THANG

Kanda: *curses under breath*

Feisty: Time for a haircut!

Kuroi: And just for the hell of it, Lavi gets to give Kanda a haircut!

Kanda: HELL NO!

Feisty: Let's strap him down!

Kuroi: Lavi, here are your supplies!

Lavi: Oh yaa!

*After 10 minutes of screams, yells, and crying*

Lavi: Wala!

Kanda: GRRRR

Feisty: Nice haircut!

Kanda: You! *attemps to slice down Feisty but remembers Kuroi took mugen*

Allen: that's what you get bakanda! *rolling on the floor laughing*

Tyki and Road: Who was crying like a baby?

Kanda: Lavi.

Lavi:*removes hand from eye* HE HEADBUTTED ME!

Feisty: Now you can wear 2 eye patches!

Kuroi: Lucky!

Road: This game is fun!~

Kuroi: Hm... Road... SPIN IT.

Road: *Spins the Wheel* No! *cries*

Feisty: Road, give me all the candy have.

Kuroi: and since we are the hostesses we get eat it!

Road: Why? *whimpers*

Feisty: Cuz you'll get fat like Earl!

Earl: Hey…

*road runs off*

Kuroi: harsh….

Feisty: Road's torture is done!

Everyone: *sweat drops*

Allen: FEISTY IS NOW MY NEW BEST-FRIEND!

Feisty and Allen: *happy dance*

Kuroi: back to business…Lenalee, your up!

Lenalee: umm….okkay *spins*

Feisty: Makeover by Road!

Kuroi: But you scared her off…..

Road: I'm back! I just went to get candy cuz it makes me feel better!

Lenalee: oh boy.

Road: Yay! I love to play with Lenalee's hair!

Hostesses: Into the room!

Rever: Since when was there a room here?

Hostesses: We magically created it!

Allen: Since when do you have magic powers?

Hostesses: Since we are the hostesses and we can do what we want.

Lavi: THERE MAGICALLY DELICIOUS!

Kuroi: That we are!

*moments later lenalee walkes out of random room that feisty and kuroi magically created!*

Lenalee: Please tell me I don't look like a clown...

Feisty: what drugs do you take?

Road: None.

Kuroi: The make over is actually pretty decent.

Lenalee: You sure?

Kuroi: Not really...*laughs weakly*

Lenalee: *Sighs*

Feisty:…

Kuroi:….

Allen: You look….nice?

Lavi: *laughing of course*

Road: I worked hard on her hair!

Lavi: And it looks stupid! *between laughs*

Road: *pulls lero out of nowhere and beats Lavi with it*

Lavi: I'm done now…..*passes out*

Kanda: Che, idiot.

Hostesses: AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST! REVER!

Kuroi: Why is Rever even here?

Feisty: To make sure Komui doesn't lose it….but I made him play our little game…..*evil smirk*

Kanda: JUST SPIN THE STUPID WHEEL SO I CAN GO HOME AND GET AWAY FROM YOU CRAZY PEOPLE!

Rever: Spins wheel

Kuroi: Paperwork!

Lenalee: Saw that one coming a mile away.

Feisty: Here get to work!

Earl: * hand Reever paper work*

Rever: This is alot... *faints*

Kuroi: hey Rever. REVER. *Pokes at Rever*

Feisty: Geeze, you guys have some bad luck!

Kuroi: Ya! No one got a torture pass!

Hostesses: Oh well, we aren't complaining.

Everyone but feisty and kuroi: Evil

Hostesses: And that's all the time we have for today! See you next time on…..

Everyone: WHEEL OF TORTURE!

**Feistyfire: Reviews would be awesome and leave suggestions of different methods of torture for next chapter!**

**Kuroi Ookami13: If you do, you can either have a peice of Kanda's hair or a cookie!**


	2. Episode 2

Feisty: Oh ya! Thanks to our reviewers, we have some AWESOME torture to put kanda-I mean the -man cast through!

Kuroi: But mostly Kanda….

Feisty: We have 2 less players cuz Komui has paperwork to do and Reever has to finish his torture from last chapter…episode…thingy.

Kuroi: Nice choice of words….

Feisty: Thanks! *big smile*Loving the hair btw Kanda

Kanda: You guys are so stupid sometimes you know that?

Kuroi: Your just mean cuz I still have mugen!

Feisty: DID YOU JUST INSULT MY MOTHER KANDA!

Lavi: Feisty is on a bit of a sugar rush so…..ya

Kanda: Che.

Feisty: Since Kanda likes to insult people's mothers, he can spin first.

Kanda: No

Kuroi: Yes

Kanda: No

Feisty: Yesss

Kanda: Go to hell

Hostesses: JUST SPIN THE DAMN WHEEL!

Kanda: *spins wheel*

Feisty: NO ONE INSULTS MY MOTHER! *crazy laughh*

Kuroi: *sighs* And i thought I was random... Kanda! You get ten Kunai thrown at you!

Earl: *hands Feisty and Kuroi 5 kunai each*

Kuroi: Reviewer that I forgot the name of go and receive your cookie or hair!

Feisty: Thanks again for this awesome idea crazycomedian !

Kanda: I bet you can't even hit me!

Lenalee: Actually, they have pretty good aim.

Allen: Surprisingly. They where throwing them on a board before you got here!

Kanda: We'll see about that.

Feisty: You wanna make a bet you mother-hater?

Kuroi: um….

Kanda: Fine, if you can hit me, I'll give you $1,000 and let you shave my head.

Lenalee: What are you doing with Timcampy Allen?

Allen: Recording one of the best moments of my life!

Lavi: ON WITH THE SHOW!

*ten kunai later*

Feisty: Ha! WE WIN! Where's our money?

Kanda: *hands $1,000 and goes and shakes like a chiwawa in a corner* so scary.

Kuroi: You didn't have to scare him like that….but what's done is done *bursts out laughing along with everyone else*

Feisty: I would of taken it off but I showed mercy and aimed that last one close enough….right between his legs!

Kuroi: Cruel person you are.. *still laughing*

Lavi: *Laughing his ass off*

Kanda: Lavi said he wants to go next!

Lavi: WHAT! Now thats just cruel... *spins wheel*

Kuroi: Now you have to watch Okane ga nai! I'll go buy it Wal-Mart right now!

Feisty: Do they even have it at Wal-Mart?

Kuroi: ... Well they do now! *hands Lavi manga*

Lavi: Do I have to? *puppy dog eyes*

Feisty: Well…ya you have to!

Kuroi and Kanda: To the couch!

*After several grueling hours of Okane Ga Nai*

Hostesses: That wasn't so bad was it?

Lavi: Yes it was….I'm scarred for life now! *starts crying*

Kanda: Serves you right, carrot-top

Kuroi: Due to popular demand and enjoyment of torturing Kanda, he will spin once again!

Kanda: I thought we each spun once!

Feisty: Fine you won't spin, we'll tell you your torture method this time sent to us once again from crazycomedian!

Kuroi: *snickers* You have to watch Allen eat all of your soba!

Kanda: What? NO! MY SOBA!

Lenalee: Someone needs to learn how to share!

Tyki: Even Road shares her candy…..sometimes

Kanda: I still say no….

Allen: For once I agree with him…..I hate soba.

Hostesses: THEN IT'S DOUBLE TORTURE!

Kuroi: Earl, you get the soba and we'll strap them down.

Feisty: So how's the soba taste?

Allen: Awful *throws up*

Kuroi: Earl!

Earl: coming…..

Kanda: *twitching* that was my soba….

Feisty: Sooo.. Kanda how do you feel about dango?

Kuroi: Its awesome!

Feisty: wasn't talking to you...

Kuroi: *frowns*

Kanda: Its disgusting... that stupid moyashi likes it...

Kuroi: Well, don't you get tortured alot...

Hostesses: Kanda! Eat Allen's dango!

Allen: Noooooo! Not my dango! (dramatic music plays in the background)

Hostesses: Yes! Yes your dango!

Lavi: We got Allen strapped down!

Allen: Whose side are you on!

Lavi: The fun side that lets me torture you and Kanda!

Allen: Forget about me Lenalee! Save the dango!

Lenalee: *sweat drops*

Road: Hahahahahaha

Tyki: Can we duck tape his mouth shut?

Kuroi: Go right ahead.

Kanda: Why me?

Feisty: Cuz people like seeing you suffer!

Kuroi: Eat the dango or I'll break mugen!

Kanda: *eats dango*

Allen: *cries*

Kanda: Ewwwww

Feisty: I think it's Tyki's turn~

Kuroi: Tyki, serve everyone chocolate fondant in a maid outfit! YES! I've always wanted to be served by Tyki! without the maid outfit part...

Feisty: Kuroi close you eyes this might be graphic...

Tyki: *changes and serves everyone*

Kuroi: TYKI!

Tyki: Serioiusly! Where do you people come up with this stuff! And why am I even doing this?

Feisty: *Holds back Kuroi* Cuz After this I will give you your cancer sticks back.

Tyki: Fondant anyone!

Kuroi: Kyaaa! *in a daze*

Feisty: Here nice job *tosses Tyki a pack of smokes* Enjoy your cancer sticks.

Tyki: OH! HOW I HAVE MISSED YOU MY DARLINGS! *sentimental moment with cigarettes*

Road: Can I go next!*spins wheel*

Kuroi: *still in daze*

Feisty: ROAD! You must give us lero and you wont get him back till Kuroi or me says so!

Road: Its so boring without lero! Tyki play with me! Play with-

Kuroi: Did someone say Tyki!

Kanda: Great the annoying hostess is back..

Kuroi: Tyki...

Feisty: *puts blindfolds on Kuroi*

Kuroi: Its sooo dark!

All but creepy Tyki fangirl: *sighs*

Feisty: Lenalee! You're next!

Lenalee: *spins wheel*

Kuroi: what happened I cant see!

Feisty: Your torture is to give up your innocence and fight Earl…..but I can't take Lenalee's innocence and I am not that cruel so she can have a free pass!

Kanda, Allen, Lavi: Why didn't you show mercy on us?

Kuroi: *Now calm cool and collected* 1. We don't want to face Komui's wrath, and look out for each other, and 3. SHE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO IS SANE IN THE STORY!

Lenalee: Thank you very much! *smiles*

Hostesses: Well that's all for now….

Everyone: Catch ya later!

*Lenalee and Allen Leaves*

Kuroi: We actually have a torture for both of them. *evil smirk*

Lavi: What are you crazy hostesses talking bout?

Feisty: We got behind the scene footage of Allen and Lenalee!~

Hostesses: Komui!~

Komui: What is it? This is my only break.

Kanda: Watch this

*Playback*

_Allen: Lenalee!_

_Lenalee: What is it Allen?_

_Allen: I just thought that since Komui had a lot of paperwork, we could spend some alone time together!_

_Lenalee: *blushes* okay_

_Allen:*Pulls lenalee into the closet*_

*Playback ends*

Komui: *speechless*

Kuroi: Wait! There's more!

*playback: closet camera!*

_Allen and Lenalee are making out in the closet_

_Allen: Lenalee?_

_Lenalee: Yes?_

_Allen: Happy 2 month anniversary_

*end*

Komui: WALKER!

Hostesses: We'll see what happens next chapter *wink*

Feistyfire: Well?

Kuroi Ookami13: Still open to ideas!

Both: REVIEW FOR SOME AWESOME COOKIES FROM WALMART!


	3. Episode 3

Feisty: That's right! The long wait is over and we are back!

Lavi: NOOOOOOO!

Kuroi: YEEEEEESS!

Kanda: Just get on with it! I want to go home and…..

Allen: And what Bakanda? Have one of your Emo-episodes? Again?

Hostesses: Emo-episodes? Whatever…

Tyki: By the way, Road and Lenalee aren't here today….

Allen: Why?

Kuroi: They went out for some 'Girl-bonding' with Miranda.

Allen: Oh….

Feisty: Since Kanda won't stop bitching, lets get this party started!

Kuroi: Due to popular demand, Allen will spin first!

Allen: What do you mean popular demand? You guys don't get that many reviews…..

Hostesses: Shut up

Allen: (spins wheel)

Lavi: Did the wheel get bigger?

Kuroi: Ya, we had to buy a new one after it got destroyed while Komui was trying to kill Allen.

Lavi and Tyki: Where was I when this happened?

Feisty: Tyki was smoking a cancer-stick-

Kuroi: And Lavi ran out of the room screaming when Komui brought out Komlin.

Lavi: Oh ya..

Tyki: I could use a smoke right bout now…..

_Flashback:_

_Komui: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY LENALEE'S PURITY YOU STUPIID OCTOPUS?_

_Allen: U-um…(almost pees his pants)_

_Komui: KOMLIN!_

_Lavi: Calm down Komui!_

_Komlin: (shoots at Allen)_

_Allen: AHHH! (moves out of the way but Komlin hits Lavi instead.)_

_Lavi: MOMMY! (runs out of room screaming)_

_Tyki: (outside) what was that scream?…..oh well (smokes)_

_Hostesses: Where's Kanda?_

_End Flashback._

Feisty: Where were you?

Kanda: (shrugs)

Allen: As much as I enjoy a walk down memory lane, can we get to my torture now?

Feisty: Sure…HAHAHAHAHA

Kanda: What?

Kuroi: Allen has to change his name to Moyashi until someone requests that we change his name back.

Lavi: HAHAHA

Allen: NO.

Kuroi: Fine, then you can go sit with Komui in the sound proof room conveniently located to your left.

Allen: ….

Feisty: Your answer?

Allen:….

Hostesses: fine.

Moyashi: What the hell?

Kuroi: Hi Moyashi!

Moyashi: You guys are mean...

Feisty: Haha!

Kuroi: who's next Feisty!

Feisty: I think Tyki, Lavi, and Kanda should have to change their names too!

Kuroi: GOOD IDEA!

Feisty: Kanda is Girly Man, Lavi is Usagi, and Tyki is-

Kuroi: SEXY BEAST!

Feisty: That works...-sweat drop-

Kuroi: I love being a hostess I get to hang out with-

-commercial-

Guy: We enjoy interrupting people when they talk!~

-end-

Kuroi: Tyki... I mean Sexy Beast!

Usagi: Since when did this thing have commercials?

Kuroi: I don't know….

Feisty: Moving on…..

Hostesses: Spin the wheel Girly Man!~

Girly Man: (spin's wheel)

Feisty: Oh-

Kuroi: My-

Hostesses: GOD!

Usagi: What's wrong?

Feisty: (whispers in Usagi's ear)

Usagi: EWWWW

Moyashi: Tell me too!

Usagi: (tells Moyashi)

Moyashi: (faints)

Girly Man: What is it?

Feisty:…Kuroi, you tie him to the chair and I'll go get 'it'

Kuroi:…..okay

(Girly Man gets tied to a chair)

Kuroi: Did you get the blindfolds?

Feisty: Ya (hands blindfolds to Kuroi and Usagi)

Kuroi:…Earl….your on…..

Earl: oooookaaaayy!

(Walks in the room dancing in a bikini to Justin Beiber's "baby)

Girly Man: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

5 minutes later….

Feisty: Since Kanda had to go through…..that….-

Kuroi: We'll give him a pass on his next torture and we'll change his name back…out of pitty.

Kanda: (sits in corner)

Moyashi: (finally wakes up) Are you having another one of your Emo-episodes?

Kanda: yes…

Feisty: Let him be…..I know how to cheer him up! You thinking what I'm thinking Kuroi?

Kuroi: I believe so! Lets work some magic!

Usagi: What are you two talking about? Magic?

*POOF!*

Everyone: HAHAHAHAHA

Kanda: Now he really is an Usagi

Moyashi: I wanna give him a carrot!

Usagi: WHO? WHY? HOW!

Feisty: US!

Kuroi: BECAUSE!

Hostesses: WERE MAGICALLY DELICIOUS!

Usagi: How long will I stay like this?

Hostesses: Don't know…..

Sexy Beast: Walks in the room.) What's with the orange rabbit?

Kanda: it's the Usagi, where were you?

Sexy Beast: Takin' a smoke!

Feisty: you left to go smoke an hour ago!

Sexy Beast: your point?

Feisty: Nevermind…and the rabbit is Usagi

Sexy Beast: Figured..

Kuroi: And since Moyashi's punishment counted for everyone, he has to sit with Komui in his…holding cell

Moyashi: (pales and tries to run away)

Kanda: Oh no you don't. ( grabs Moyashi and throws him in with Komui)

Feisty: you got 5 minutes starting….NOW!

Moyashi: AHHHHH

Usagi: Komui's like a wild animal.

Hostesses: yaaahhh…

Kuroi: Sexy Beast's turn!

Sexy Beast: (spin's the stupid thing)

Feisty: You gotta watch some Dora.

Kuroi: Sorry Sexy Beast….(ties him to the chair)

Sexy Beast: No matter, I can just phase through it!

Hostesses: We took your powers away remember?

Sexy Beast: Shit….

(Dora Turns on)

Dora: Where's the bridge?

Sexy Beast: Right behind you.

Dora: I can't find the bridge. Whheeeeres the bridge?

Sexy Beast: It's right behind you!

Dora: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeres the briiidge!

Sexy Beast: IT'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU YOU STUPID-ASS MEXICAN!

Dora: There's the bridge!

Sexy Beast:…..

Feisty: (Turns off Dora)

Kanda: (Pulls Moyashi out of Komui's room) Well that was entertaining.

Kuroi: Which one?

Kanda: Both

Moyashi: (is taken to the hospital cuz Komui put him an a coma.)

Feisty: Since Moyashi is in a coma…we'll end here for today.

Kuroi: Lenalee and Road will be back next time but I doubt Komui will be cuz we just sent him to a mental hospital!

Hostesses: See ya next time!

Usagi: Please review cuz these two can't come up with everything ya know!

Sexy Beast: What about Reever?

Feisty: Nah

Kuroi: He's a real downer.

Kanda: Will you just finish up! I wanna go home!

Hostesses: Bye! REVIEW!


	4. Episode 4

**Author's Note: Just wanna say thanks to ****Alex 727**** for these awesome ideas. **

Feisty: Since we haven't updated in a while, we will just skip all that stuff we put at the beginning and cut to the chase!

Kuroi: And since we take the reviewer's torture methods and put them in our story, we are getting rid of the wheel cuz they keep getting broken, but the name will stay the same.

Lenalee: What happened to the wheel? And why is Lavi a rabbit?

Lavi:…..it was broken…..and those crazy hostesses turned me into a rabbit.

Tyki: but they bought a new one…and forgot how to change Lavi back.

Kanda: And Moyashi broke the new one.

Road: We missed a lot when we where gone huh?

Moyashi: ya. (grumbles)

Lenalee: Why is your name changed to "Moyashi"?

Moyashi: Cuz these people are mean and just plain insane!

Kuroi: Oh ya we are forgetting something aren't we?…..but I can't remember

Feisty: OH! Allen gets his name changed back, courtesy of Alex 727! Who also came up with the torture methods for this chapter.

Everybody: Thank you!

Feisty: Lets start.

Kuroi: First, Kanda has to watch My Little Pony with Lavi.

Komui: Can I watch too!

Everyone: (turns to Lenalee)

Lenalee: Why are you asking me if he can? What am I, his babysitter?

Lavi: Might as well be.

Tyki: I wanna know why you two didn't protest against watching that….disgrace to television.

Allen: Ya I was wondering that too…..

Road: And why does Komui want to watch it?

Lenalee: When he did all his paperwork I would let him watch it, which wasn't very often.

Road: But why….that?

Lenalee: (shrugs) I don't know

Kanda: And to your previous question, We didn't object cuz we don't want to die, end up in a mental hospital, or go through any other things they can do to us.

Lavi: (nods)

Kuroi: Okay…..so….Lavi, Kanda, and Komui better get their butts on the couch cuz the show is starting.

Kanda and Lavi: …kay (grumbles)

Komui: YAAAAAAAY!

(I'm not even gonna describe the show or their reactions cuz I don't wanna scare myself XD)

Komui: YAAAAY!

Lenalee: Time for your nap Komui

Everyone: (sweat drops)

Komui: (lays on couch and falls asleep)

Lavi: That wasn't as bad as I thought.

Kanda: It was worse

Lavi: Yup.

Allen, Lenalee, and Road: HOLY CRAP!

Kanda: What? Where's the fire? (pulls out Mugen)

Feisty: Hold the phone Kanda

Kuroi: Ya seriously take a chill pill

Kanda: Then what's wrong?

Road: Lavi isn't a rabbit anymore!

Hostesses: So it only lasts a couple of days….good to know

Lavi: Yes! Am I still as devilishly handsome as I was before Ladies?

Ladies: (sweat drops)…..

Tyki: Lets just move on before Allen kills the Rabbit boy.

Kuroi: Good idea.

Feisty: Okay so next-

Allen: -Kanda has to eat all of Road's candy while she watches!

Hostesses: (smacks Allen with a giant frying pan) NEVER interrupt us.

Road: But I don't have any candy left.

Kanda: Good

Lavi: Who wants candy!

Kanda: (Glares)

Tyki and Lenalee: Nice timing.

Road: When did you leave?

Lavi: Allen asked me to a while ago….said something about torturing Kanda so I agreed.

Feisty: (high-fives Allen) Nice

Kuroi: So now that problem is solved…Kanda, start eating!

Feisty: Road, watch!

Allen: Tyki, you…

Lenalee: Wake up Komui

Tyki and Lenalee: (staring contest)…..fine

Kanda: Lets get this over with.

Road: Wait! Don't eat my candy!

(too late)

(5 minutes later)

Lavi: Nice job

Kanda: I could use a nice bowl of soba right bout now.

Kuroi: Oh ya….Soba is Illegal.

Allen: Hahaha!

Feisty: So is Dango.

Allen: (cries in a corner)

Kanda: (smirks) Whatever, I can just have tempura.

Hostesses: That's illegal too.

Kanda and Allen: WHAT! SINCE WHEN!

Hostesses: Since now.

Kanda: SAYS WHO!

Hostesses: Us!

Lenalee and Road: Sorry Allen.

Road: That's what you get for eating my candy Kanda!

Kuroi: Hey Tyki, did you wake up Komui?

Tyki: Ya

Feisty: Why are you holding your face?

Tyki: Komui punched me….he's not easy to wake up.

Lenalee: That's why you woke him up

Tyki: oh

Kuroi: Since Komui is finally awake, we can move on.

Feisty: The next one is for Lavi.

Lavi: Mkay

Kuroi: All you have to do is dance with Lenalee…simple

Komui: No

Feisty: Ya…hey will someone tie him up?

Tyki: I got it.

Hostesses: Thanks

Lavi: ….um…. Can I have this dance Lenalee?

Allen: No way in hell.

Road: (Ties up Allen)

Lenalee: (sweat drops) sure…..one dance wouldn't hurt.

(one dance later)

Lenalee: You are a horrible dance Lavi.

Lavi: Gee. Thanks a lot

Lenalee: Don't mention it.

Kanda: Where's Allen and Komui?

Kuroi: They got so mad and psyco that we had to put them into the soundproof room to keep Lavi safe-

Lavi: You really do care!

Kuroi:-cuz we'll need him later

Lavi: thanks! X(

Feisty: Okay, next!

Kuroi: Tyki, can you do the honor's?

Tyki: Sure thing.

Feisty: Lets just do it without telling them

Tyki and Kuroi: Sounds good (smirks)

Kuroi: I'll get Lavi

Feisty: I call Allen

Tyki: Guess I'm stuck with Kanda.

Kuroi, Feisty, and Tyki: (drags Lavi, Allen, and Kanda into a soundproof room)

Feisty: Would you like to push the button Tyki?

Tyki: It'll be my pleasure.

Lavi: What's going on?

Tyki: (pushes button and a door opens revealing a huge crowd of obsessed fan girls)

The boys: YOUR DEAD FOR THIS!

Komui: What's going on!

Feisty: oops…we forgot Komui was in there….

Road: How long are they gonna stay in there?

Kuroi: About five minutes or so

Lenalee: Should we get the next one ready?

Feisty: That'd be great thanks.

Lenalee: Welcome. I'll go get him now

Road: I'll come too!

Tyki: They became good friends.

Feisty: Yup

Kuroi: I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing…..

Tyki and Feisty: (nods)

(Five minutes later)

Tyki: Time is up

Hostesses: mkay (snaps their fingers and all the fan girls disappear and Lavi and Allen are outside of the room.)

Allen: Why couldn't you have done that earlier?

Kuroi: idk….didn't feel like it.

Kanda: Why am I still in the room!

Lenalee: Cuz your next. (walks up to the others followed by Road and Froi Tiedoll)

Lavi: How'd you get the general here?

Road: We told him he could have some quality time with his beloved son.

Kanda: WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE I'M GONNA-

Allen: What happened to the sound?

Feisty: I didn't feel like hearing him rant.

Kuroi: Understandable

Tyki: What are we gonna do since Kanda is stuck in there and its his turn again next?

Feisty: We can skip to the next one and go back to it I guess

Everyone except Kanda: Okay.

Road: Tyki has to play poker with Allen

Tyki: That's all? Then I'll play

Allen: BRING IT ON!

(A few hands later)

Tyki: Damn….I'm broke….and I lose

Allen: yay!

Tyki: So that was my torture? Losing my pride?

Kuroi: nope, now you have to watch Dora for a whole day.

Tyki: NOOOO!

Feisty: Ya sorry. (ties Tyki to the couch)

Kuroi: And Sheryll is gonna watch with you.

Allen: We'll come get you in a day.

Kanda: (runs out of the soundproof room) I'm never spending time with him again!

Everyone: Why?

Tiedoll: That's how babies are made!

Everyone: O.o

Kuroi: Well, lets finish this.

Feisty: Already on it. (ties Kanda to a chair.)

Kanda:…Why am I tied to a chair?

Hostesses: It's our favorite passtime.

Kanda: seriously?

Hostesses: no

Kuroi: But it does seem like we have been tying up people a lot lately.

Feisty: Ya (short pause)

Lenalee and Road: Can we die his hair?

Kanda: WHAT? NO!

Feisty: Sure, and Lavi can braid it.

Lenalee and Road: (dies his hair pink) It's a good color on him

Lavi: (braids his hair) Ya he looks pretty good.

Kuroi: (takes a picture) If only we can get him in a dress….

Feisty: What about this one (holds up a green dress with lots of ruffles and flowers)

Kanda: (Suddenly breaks out of the ropes and rips the dress) No way in hell.

Allen: Sorry but I don't think we'll be able to get him into a dress….

Everyone: (Nods)

Kuroi: Well, that's all we have for now.

Feisty: Send us some more reviews cuz you know you love us XD

Lavi: Ya I'm really starting to have some fun with this!

Everyone but Tyki and Kanda: Same here.

Kanda:…..I just realized that I was in every torture today except one…why is that?

Lenalee: Maybe people like to watch you suffer.

Allen: I think that's it.

Lavi: Oh well, I'm going to bed….Review please!

Road: Ya I'll even be nice and share my Candy if you do.


	5. Episode 5

**Thank you GoldPhantom and z-eion for the ideas for this chapter! Keep e'm comming!**

Kuroi: Guess what?

Kanda: What?

Feisty: No, guess!

Kanda: No

Kuroi: Then you don't get to know!

Kanda: Fine with me

Lavi: Ohhh! I'll guess!

Feisty: Knock yourself out

Kanda: Seriously

Lavi: We got a review already!

Hostesses: Ding Ding Ding! We have a winner!

Lavi: What do I win?

Hostesses: …nothing

Allen: Haha!

Lenalee: (hits Allen on the head) Don't laugh at him

Tyki: Well, I can see who wears the pants in this relationship.

Everyone but Allen: Agreed.

Allen: You guys all suck…except Lenalee.

Lenalee: Don't talk back either

Allen: Sorry Lenalee

Tyki: I rest my case.

Road: Lets get started!

Komui:Why are you all excited?

Road: Cuz I get to be violent!

Lavi: You do that everyday.

Road: But now I have permission to!

Kuroi: Okay…to start, Allen gets whatever he wants.

Everyone but Allen: Great (groans)

Allen: Yes! (fist pump!)

Feisty: So…that means you can have whatever you want for this chapter.

Allen: I actually wanna know how this is torture for me

Lenalee: Its torture for everyone but you!

Allen: Oh

Kanda: Baka

Allen: Then I want 20 mitarashi dango, 3 steaks, 17 potatoes, 2 omlets, 8 trays of tempura, a huge cake, 11 whole pizzas, umm that's all…..oh! Add some fish too!

Everyone: (sweat drops)here

Allen: YAY! FOOD!

Feisty: Since he's eating, we'll move on.

Kuroi: Hey, where's Tyki?

Road: I think he ran to the bathroom

Lavi: You okay in there?

Tyki: No (throws up) How can someone eat so much?

Lenalee: I have no idea

Lavi: When Lenalee and Allen have kids, I hope they don't have Allen's appetite.

Komui: OVER MY DEAD BODY!

Kuroi: That could be arranged.

Komui: My sweet Lenalee would never let you monsters do that to me!

Lenalee: Maybe I would

Komui: WHAT! (hyperventilates and passes out)

Everyone: (looks at Lenalee)

Lenalee: His sister-complex is starting to get a little…out of hand

Kanda: Che

Kuroi: Okay, well Kanda is next (snickers)

Feisty: (whispers to Road)

Road: Mkaky (walks over to Kanda and punches him in the balls)

Kanda: oof! (falls over holding his crotch.) MY MANHOOD!

Allen: ROFL!

Tyki: (walks into room and sees Kanda on the floor in pain and Allen ROFL) What did I miss?

Lavi: Road punched Kanda in the balls!

Tyki: AH! I MISSED IT!

Feisty: Ya sorry

Kuroi: Road can hit him again if you want.

Road: No, I don't think I could hit him again….and his reaction was priceless!

Feisty: Or we can watch the recording of it.

Lenalee: When did you record it?

Kuroi: Ya I didn't even see you move

Lavi: Tell me how you did it!

Feisty: A magician never reveals her secrets

Kuroi: You won't even tell me? Your co-hostess?

Feisty:…..There are cameras everywhere.

Everyone: Seriously!

Kuroi: Since when!

Feisty:….I really don't know.

Tyki: Can I see the video then?

Kuroi: Sure (plays video)

_Video:_

_Kuroi: Well, Kanda is next (snickers)_

_Feisty: (Whispers to Road)_

_Road: Mkay! (walks over to Kanda and punches him in the balls)_

_Kanda: oof! (falls over holding his crotch.) MY MANHOOD!_

_Allen: ROFL!_

_Tyki: (walks into room and sees Kanda on the floor in pain and Allen ROFL) What did I miss?_

_Lavi: Road punched Kanda in the balls!_

_Tyki: AH! I MISSED IT!_

_End Video:_

Road: And here we are!

Tyki: (Joins Allen on the floor)

Kuroi: Hey Kanda, you okay?

Kanda: (grunts)

Kuroi: I'll take that as a no.

Feisty: Hey Earl, get him some ice!

Earl: (walks in wearing a nurses outfit and hands him ice)

Hostesses: Thanks!

Lavi: So what now?

Feisty: We send Road on a date with Allen to France!

Road:YAY! Can i Lenalee?

Allen: She won't let you

Lenalee: Go Ahead

Allen: (jaw drops to the floor)

Hostesses: Its setteled! (Teleports Allen and Road to France)

(POOF!)

Lavi: Why'd ya say it was okay Lenalee?

Lenalee: I read the list and Allen can't be here for the next one.

Kuroi: That was a smart move

Feisty: You just saved us Lenalee!

Tyki: What's going on?

Kuroi: You gotta kiss Lenalee.

Tyki: (shrugs) sure

Komui: (jumps awake) NOOOOOOO!

Kuroi: Oh good! Your up!

Feisty: We need you to watch!

Komui: I'm not going to watch cuz its not going to happen!

Lavi: (holds back Komui) HELP!

Kanda: (helps Lavi hold back Komui)

Lenalee: thanks guys.

Tyki:Lets get this over with.

Feisty: Having second thoughts?

Tyki: I just don't wanna die.

Lavi and Kanda: neither do we.

Kuroi: Well, have fun! (pushes Lenalee and Tyki into a steel room with a window to see)

Lenalee: Ok

Tyki: Ya.

(Kiss)

Komui: NOOOOO

Hostesses: Get Lenalee out and throw Komui with Tyki!

Lavi: Roger! (Throws Komui into the room after Lenalee walks out.)

(Road walks in while Allen dramatically runs to Lenalee)

Allen: LEEEEEENAAAAAAALEEEEEE!

Lenalee: Oh, hey Allen.

Road: What's going on with Komui and Tyki?

Feisty: Just a little dissagreement.

Lavi: can we move on yet! I wanna see Kanda eat Donkey crud!

Kanda: Donkey-whaat?

Hostesses: Earl!(snaps their fingers) Bring in the crud!

Kanda: I'm not eating that

Kuroi: Yes you are!

Feisty: Unless you want to take another hit to your manhood!

Hostesses: EAT!

Kanda: (shoves the whole plate of Donkey crud into his mouth)

Lenalee: Ewww..gross!

Allen: What is donkey crud anyway?

Kanda: (throwing up on the floor)

Lavi: I know!

Everyone: Well we don't wanna know!

Kuroi: We are gonna have two new people joining us for a while, Bak and Fou!

Bak: Hey what's u-Lenalee-san! (gets hives)

Fou: Baka, hey why is the girly samurai throwing up?

Lavi: He ate Donkey crud.

Fou: I remember when i made Bak eat it XD

Bak: (suddenly better) When did you do that?

Fou: Remember when I brought you food last week while you were sick?

Bak: Yah?

Fou: That's when

BaK: That's why it tasted so bad!

Fou: You should know by now not to trust me with stuff like that.

Hostesses: Welcome!

Fou: Hey! (Hugs Lenalee, Kuroi, Feisty, and Road)

Bak: Don't I get a hug?

Girls: No

Bak: Awe

Feisty: Isn't there something you need to tell Lenalee?

Bak: What are you talking about?

Kuroi: (Whispers) Tell her your a pervert!

Bak: I can't do that! And I am not!

Fou: Say it or I'll feed you that Donkey crud again and confiscate your pictures!

Bak: Still no!

Feisty: We'll tell Komui.

Bak: L-Lenalee?

Lenalee: Yes?

Bak: I-I'm a p-p-p-p(gets smacked in the head by Fou)PERVERT!

Lenalee: (in shock) O.o

Allen: And a creeper.

Lavi: Ya i've seen those pictures too

Lenalee: Pictures! (furious blush)

Komui:BAK!

Bak: (pees his pants)

Kanda: How attractive.

Feisty: Here are the keys to Komlin! (Tosses the keys to KomuI)

Kuroi: Everyone in the safety room!

(Everybody but Komui, Allen, and Bak run into the safety Room)

Tyki and Road: Why is Allen out there?

Allen and Komui: CUZ WE ARE GONNA KICK BAK'S ASS!

Fou, Kuroi, and Feisty: Get him!

Lenalee and Road: Go Allen!

BOOM

SMASH

SCREAM

EXPLOSION

Feisty: Well, since theyre buisy, let's end here

Everyone: Okay!

Kuroi: Oh! And Allen gets mine and Feisty's job for the next two chapters.

Hostesses: So you can send in some ideas for us too!

Fou: Review! And the next chapter will be comming very soon!


	6. Episode 6

**These ideas are from GoldPhantom and z-eion! I haven't done this in a while but, DGM is not mine!**

Kuroi: Sorry to say, but since Cupcakinator's ideas involve Allen and he is the host for two chapters, your ideas will have to wait, but will be used in chapter 8. Sorry!

Feisty: Well, Lets move on.

Allen:Okay! I'm Allen and i'll be the host for the next 2 chapters! (Eats Dango)

Lavi: So all mighty mini host, who's first?

Allen: I'M NOT SHORT! I'M FUN SIZED!

Tyki: Ya keep telling yourself that short-stack.

Allen: Did u just compare me to mini pancakes?

Lenalee: I love mini pancakes!

Tyki: Me too!

Feisty and Kuroi: So do us!

Lavi: That was some horrible Grammar right there.

Kuroi: What do we look like? English teachers?

Feisty: Ewww

Lavi: I was just saying that your grammer is bad.

Kuroi: What do you want us to do?

Lavi: Fix that sentence!

Feisty: Fine! Damn Grammar Nazi!

Kanda: As much as I am loving this conversation, can we just move on? I'm missing my favorite show!

Lavi: What's your favorite show?

Kanda: You don't need to know.

Lavi: Tell me!

Kanda: No!

Lenalee: Just move on!

Bak: Ahhh! Look at my Lenalee-chan take charge!

Allen: She's not your "Lenalee-chan!"

Lenalee: -sigh- Allen, just move on

Allen: Fine Komui has to see a psychiatrist for his issues.

Kanda: that's it?

Lenalee: No, it also says that Road is the psychiatrist.

Allen: Oh ya!

Road: Do i at least get paid?

Allen: No

Lenalee: We'll give you 2 bags of candy if you do!~

Road: Show me the problem child!

Tyki: Go look in a mirror

Lavi: BURN!

Allen: Should we watch from a camera, just incase things get...well violent?

Kuroi: You're the host... -pout-

Feisty: I wanna be in the violence!

Fou: Is she okay?

Kuroi: She forgot to eat her banana this morning and she is very sleep deprived

Bak: And that has anything to do with this how?

Kuroi: She gets cranky and violent when she doesn't have her morning banana.

Lavi: And the sleep thing?

Kuroi: She gets the giggles when she is really tired and tends to act..weird.

Bak: She's already weird

Kuroi: More than usual.

Everyone but Feisty, Komui and Road: (walk into a room with monitors)

Road: So, tell me about your problems

Komui: I HAVE NO PROBLEMS! -Sobs-

Road: Ah, According to this paper... -looks at paper- You have a mental ilness!

Rabdom dude: *Hands different paper* (**yes, it says rabdom dude**)

Road: Wrong Page...

Komui: I told you so!

Road: This one says you have a sister-complex

Komui: I MOST CERTAINLY DO NOT!

Road: Uh-huh so you say

Komui: I'm telling the truth

Road: Let's prove it then

Komui: HOW WILL YOU PROVE IT!

Road: we can always have Lenalee kiss someone infront of you until you agree. may this method be used Allen?

**Allen: Only if i'm the one to kiss her.**

**Lenalee: But I wanna Kiss Tyki!**

(just to specify, if it is bold, the characters are inside the room with the monitors)

**Kuroi: I wanna kiss Tyki...**

Fiesty: Why Tyki? Are you cheating on Allen with him, Lenalee?

**Lenalee: -shrugs- Tyki's a good kisser.**

**Allen: I'm not a good kisser?**

**Lavi: Apparently not if she wants to kiss Tyki instead.**

**Kanda: I figured as much.**

**Tyki: Do I get a say in this?**

**Allen: Well i think Tyki should state his opinion on this! I bet he doesn't wanna kiss Lenalee anyway.**

**Tyki: Actually, I wouldn't mind kissing her**

**Lenalee: Yay!**

**Allen: Nobody cares about your opinion Tyki.**

**Kuroi: I care!**

Fiesty: ok

**Tyki and Lenalee kiss**

Allen: o.o

Bak: :O

Lavi: XD

Kanda: :/

Kuroi: :3

Komui: O.o :O Tyki, YOU SHALL DIE!

Feisty: I think you were right Road, he does have a sister complex.

Road: Yeah...

Feisty: Tyki's really gonna die huh?

Road: Probably...

**Lenalee: What are you guy's gonna do about it?**

Feisty and Kuroi: This! (jump kick Komui and Allen in the faces)

Fou: What was that?

Lavi: I think they went ninja.

Kanda: Since when are you two ninja's?

Kuroi: Since when were you a man?T

-twitch-

-grin-

-growl-

Kanda: Since I was born, what about you? Man-lady?

-snap-

Lenalee: Did anyone else hear something snap?

Bak: I think it was Kuroi's sanity

Kanda: Ha, all talk, no game!

-SMACK-

Kanda: OWW WHAT THE FU-(sensored)

Everyone: Damn!

Feisty: Here Kuroi, have a smoothie

Kuroi: Smoothie!

Road: I am sorry, but there is no help for Komui.

Lenalee: Ya, i figured

Tyki: Thank you magically delicious-ninja chicks!

Kuroi and Feisty: No prob.

Allen: great, there's a new black eye...Okay, so now Bak gets the same treatment that Kanda did last chapter.

Kanda: Finally! Someone else gets hit!

Bak: What are you talking about?

Kuroi: Oh...he wasn't here~

Lavi: Well, this is gonna be enjoyable.

Feisty: Is everyone here this time?

Lavi: Let me see...yup.

Lenalee: Where's Komui?

Kuroi: He is temporarily incapacitated...

Allen: GO! ^.^

Road: -smiles and walks over to Bak-

Bak: What's going on?

Road: Your gonna feel a little pain...

Fou: I like where this is going!

Bak: Then...?

Kanda: Alot of pain.

Bak: No Sto- -cries-

Road: -kicks Bak where the sun don't shine-

Kanda: -pales-

Tyki: What's wrong?

Kanda: just some bad memories...

Everyone: oh.

Allen: Next, we have a question from one of our favorite reviewers...You know who you are ;)

Lenalee: The question is for Fou.

Fou: Yay! finally something for me!

Tyki: Here's your question!

Road: Good announcer's voice!

Tyki: Why thank you! When Allen was at the asian branch to restore his innocence did you get a crush on him?

Fou: -blushes madly-

Lavi: wow, she's almost as red as my hair!

Kanda: I think she has you beat Usagi.

Lavi: Damn!

Kuroi: Don't lie or GoldPhantom and z-eion will send level 100 akuma to attack you!

Allen: They don't even exist!

Feisty: Wanna bet!

Fou and Allen: No!

Lavi: Well?

Fou:...yes.

Kanda: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

Allen: -faints-

Lavi and Tyki: Rofl! (rofls)

Lenalee: -snickers-

Allen: Why are you snickering?

Feisty: Look who's up!

Kuroi: Have a nice sleep sleeping beauty?

Kanda: He obviously needs more beauty sleep if he looks like that.

Kuroi:BURN!

Feisty: What's with Kanda Dropin' all the burns today?

Kanda: I had a banana this morning

Lavi: Ah...that explains...NOTHING!

Lenalee: Allen, i don't want to have this conversation right now!

Allen: Fine! We'll talk about this later! Next!

Tyki: we have another question.

Kanda: When did this turn into Jeopardy?

Kuroi: Idk...but you don't get money for answering questions right.

Road: Okay, Lavi, what is Allen's Noah? if you guess right you get to be punched by road. if wrong you get beaten up by Allen's Noah.

Road: Weeeee

Lavi: The Neah Walker! The Musician!

Allen: Yupp!

Road: Ready?

Lavi: -cries- ya...owwwww

Road: Sorry...our reviewers are violent.

Feisty and Kuroi: Not that we are complaining...

Tyki: Lets move on

Allen: Mkay Road has to propose to Allen and he has to say yes. okay!-WAIT. WHAT!

Lavi: XD

Allen: What about Lenalee!

Lenalee: Ya...i've been meaning to talk to you about that.

Allen: What are you saying.?

Lenalee: We're through. Sorry. We can still be friends though.

Allen: Why? When did you make this decision?

Lenalee: After I cheated on you with Tyki...

Allen: -gasp!-

Everyone: -Looks at Tyki.-

Tyki: Yo -waves-

Road: Allen will you marry me?

Allen: Guess I got no choice huh?

Road: Nope

Allen: Fine whatever.

Lenalee: Guess what.

Feisty: You and Tyki are going out?

Tyki: We are going out.

Kuroi: yay...

Allen: -sulks-

Kanda: I know what'll make you feel better...

Allen: What?

Kanda: Poker.

Dark Allen: Lets go!

Kuroi: When did you start to care Kanda? Geeze.

Feisty: It's the Apocalypse!

Lavi: Those banana's to funny stuff to you.

Fou: I guess we're playing poker.

Dark Allen: You bet!

Feisty: Lets end it here so we can save ourselves the embarrassment of losing everything i own...

Kuroi: Ya...REVIEW!

(we're a little backed up so ya...i'll catch up ;) )


End file.
